Bidding Farewell

Lois Grace Barlow and Shirley "Red" Augustus Barlow, Jim's paternal grandparents, both passed away within the last year. It was decided that they would have a combined memorial service for the two of them at a later date, ensuring that as much as the family could be there.

His grandparents lived in Duanesburg, New York and raised their children there, so we packed up and hit the road for New York! What a beautiful place.... surrounded by the Catskill Mountains, so lush and green.

We stayed with Abbey, Jim's cousin, and her husband, Mick, and four children. She lives in a beautiful old farmhouse, that they've completely renovated, right next to her father's dairy farm. Here's her chicken coop... they have MANY chickens, but I only caught a few in this picture. It certainly does not do it justice. When we left they sent us home with six dozen eggs!!!

Almost as soon as we pulled in, we had to go and see the cows!!

 Aunt Christine held a timid Ian, as he studied and met the baby calves. When he met the donkeys a few weeks before, he was fearless. He'd grab their nostrils and lips. This time was quite different. He'd carefully eye the calves and then, if too close, he would let out a huge, upset squeal and throw his body back into the person holding him.

 Until the cows don't need their mother's milk anymore, after the first few months, they stay in these little huts. Afterward, they move to a grassy field. As a breastfeeding mama, it was hard to see these babes separated from their moms.

 We had to get a picture of Ian under this sign... had to.

 Abbey & Mick have three cats and two of them have awesome haircuts to help with staying cool and the shedding of fur. There's a poof on the end of their tails and a mane around their heads. This is Bruce, the most social of their cats. What a character. Ian enjoyed crawling around after him...

 Thank you SOOOO much for having us, Abbey and Mick! It was wonderful to get to know you and the other family members up there just a little better. We look forward to spending more time with you all one day soon. Thank you for your warm hospitality!

The memorial service was held with the same church family where Jim's dad, John, and his siblings were raised. John officiated the service, which was part of his parents' wishes. It was a beautiful ceremony.

John, Dave, Marie, Rich, & Carol
(Youngest ---> Oldest)

Children & Significant others

And some of the grandchildren & families!

After the service we drove over to the internment, which was a beautiful drive about an hour away. 

As we walked up to where they'd be buried, Jim was hit with the smell of wild thyme. Smell has such a powerful way of bringing back memories and nostalgic feelings. According to Jim, wild thyme was a signature smell of Grammy & Grampy's yard. Apparently, it is native to that area. Uncle Dave told me that Grampy would allow wild thyme to go to seed before he'd mow the lawn, to encourage the spreading of the plant. He just loved wild thyme.

It's never easy to say goodbye to family members. Their home and warmth is missed. They are certainly missed. Hearing the stories and sharing old memories was a wonderful way to get to know them even better. I look forward to hearing more stories about them as Ian gets older and the family continues to share them with him. One day we'll all be together again.

Rest in peace, Grammy & Grampy. We love you.

Veterans Day & Grampy

Yesterday's Veterans Day was quite different this year. Many of the veterans in my life have moved on to heaven within the last year or so. My grandpa was the first to pass, having served in Guadalcanal. Then my uncle John, who served in Vietnam. And finally, Jim's Grampy, who passed away early on Saturday morning, who served in World War II as well.

Each of these men touched our lives so deeply. Each of these men were our heroes. Each of these men will live on in our hearts. And each one will certainly live on in the stories we'll tell to Ian throughout the years.

Living here in Pennsylvania for these last three weeks, I have felt the sting and the empty seats at the dinner tables. This is where my grandpa and Uncle John lived. These are the trees my grandpa trimmed, returning to the house for lunch smelling of pine, gasoline, and spearmint gum. My sleeping arrangements are above the workshop where my uncle designed much of the furniture around his home. Their presences are felt, but still I yearn to hear their familiar voices and enjoy the comfort of having them near.

Saturday we learned that Jim's grandpa, Shirley Barlow, passed away early in the morning. I've met him a couple times, but most of what I know comes from stories Jim has shared over the years.

Grampy served in the Navy as a pilot in Japan during World War II.

He was a handsome fellow with a great, curly, thick head of red hair.  I once saw a picture of him in a leather jacket with his hair slicked back and he looked like a character straight out of the movie Top Gun. Some family members think Ian may have inherited his red hair. We'll see in time.

Red Barlow worked for General Electric as a foreman for most of his life after the Navy.

Grampy met Jim's Grammy, and was five years her junior, when she stayed in his family's boarding house. They fell in love and were devoted for sixty-eight full years. When we visited the two of them this past January, they were still holding hands and speaking tenderly to each other. A beautiful testimony of marriage.


Jim fondly remembers their home in upstate New York. They lived in Duanesburg and raised their five children there. The home was a small building when they purchased it, but they added additions over the years and dug a basement and foundation around the existing building. Grampy was a hard worker, always finding a new project. He would cut down cedar trees on his property and make shingles out of them to place and replace those on the side of his house.

The property had a pond, that they put in, and a beautiful creek with large slabs of rock creating cascades of water down its entirety. Jim would spend hours creek-walking and exploring the evergreen woods surrounding the creek.

In the mornings, Jim remembers, Grampy would head down into his basement and lift weights. He had a set of barbells. The pond was where Grampy would take his morning dip after his workout. Even in the wintertime, he would place a window frame on the surface so that he could take his plunge into the ice cold water. If Jim got up early enough, he would go down and watch his grandfather lift weights and then travel up to the pond with him. Occasionally he'd join him in his swim.

Jim always remembers Grampy loved having pets. He often had a big dog that he would dote on and enjoy. He had lots of dogs; one was named Bear. We brought Leif with us last Christmas and he really enjoyed getting to pet and joke with him.

Both of them also loved birds. There were many bird feeders outside their windows throughout the year and they'd watch them come and go.

Grampy was a strong specimen until only a few short years ago. An example for Jim of what he'd like to be in his old age. We are saddened by his loss and are grateful for the hope we have of being with him again, when age and memory won't play a role in our interactions.

Rest in peace, Shirley "Red" Barlow.

Times Change

This past weekend we experienced the fall-back time change. As a teacher I always adored this weekend, getting an extra hour of sleep, feeling refreshed, and getting just a little more time to enjoy my coffee and start my day. Until, that is, a few days later when my body quickly adjusted and I felt exhausted again. The students always seemed more fresh and awake, as well, that first day back at school after the time change.

Getting ready for a bath in the sink!

Times have certainly changed. Sleeping, eating, using the bathroom, conversations, and more, all revolve around Ian. And they should. And I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm very aware of the fact that sometime this week I would have had to return to work, if I was teaching/working this year. Many friends and family have done so and I am now aware of just how hard this would be. Wow.

This week Ian has continued to become more social and aware. He smiles quite often and more often at people than before, but they are still elusive. He can often be seen smiling for no apparent reason, just smiling away.

He is an incredibly active and strong baby. His neck muscles are almost completely developed, so we have started wearing him facing out in front of us in the Boba wrap. He loves getting to look around! It's been such a blessing this week to be able to start wearing him this way. Normally we could not put him in the wrap unless he was tired and ready to fall asleep, but now we can use the wrap often and he's content. It's also so adorable :)


The rest of his body also continues to be strong. He really enjoys pushing up from a squat to stand, supported, in our laps or on the floor. His eyes get so big and excited with each push.

One of our cousin's friends brought over one of these bouncing chairs last week. At first Ian had NO interest in spending time in it, but Monday he has enjoyed sitting in it first thing in the morning. He's able to look at the hanging toys and sounds and study them now, which he wasn't able to do just last week! It's great for me because I am able to make myself a bowl of granola, get dressed, and brush my teeth before he starts to get fussy. Then it's normally time for a walk with Leif and Ian's first nap of the day!

This weekend Jim's parents came to visit. Ian was, once again, surrounded by love and cuddles. He's one loved little boy. We went on a nice, long walk with them around the property and in the field across the road. The whole time we walked, Ian rode in the Boba with his Grammy and napped. It was a nice visit and we look forward to more time with them in two weeks!

Jim gave me a huge gift last Saturday and kept Ian through two nighttime feedings! I got almost a whole five hours of solid sleep before he brought him back to me. I had to sleep far away because any cries are impossible for me to avoid or sleep through. The next day I felt like a new person. I think that a part of my brain was allowed to function again. It was wonderful and I think it has continued to help me through this week. Thanks, Jim!

I have gone to my aunt's exercise class two times this week. That's saying something because I have felt like a blob with a mush brain up until this point. I have gone on walks with Leif in the field, but not anything strenuous. It feels so good to go out and be social and get the morning started with some structured exercise! The class is also almost perfectly timed with Ian's first morning nap. Perfect.



Here comes the "You know you're a new mom when..." moment of the week. On Sunday we went to church with my grandma, aunt, and cousin. When it came time for Ian to nurse, I hopped out of the sanctuary and into the conference room where they have a speaker so that you can still hear the service. Since Ian had dropped a huge poop that morning, I left the diaper bag behind. BIG MISTAKE. He had a huge bowel movement and was very stinky while we were in the conference room. Ugh. So I took some paper towels, that were in the conference room, and wiped out the diaper and then folded a clean one inside to go against his skin. For the rest of the service we were smelling buttered popcorn (this is how my cousin, Julie, describes the smell and she's SO right).

My friend Amanda, my roommate when I worked at Teton Science Schools in Wyoming, made Ian an awesome dinosaur/dragon hat! It fits him so well and is perfect  for some of these chilly Pennsylvania days. Plus, what little boy doesn't love dinosaurs and dragons? Thank you SO much, Amanda! We love it.

The sixth week really was the peak of fussiness (for now)! The first half of his sixth week was incredibly fussy, but as the week wore on he has become so much more calm, predictable, and, dare I say, "easy." I feel like I am finally getting comfortable in knowing if he wants to feed, needs a diaper change, or needs to start settling into a nap. I also spent the first part of this week journaling his napping and nursing times to see if there was a trend and there was! He tends to take a half hour nap about an hour to an hour and a half after he wakes up. Then he takes another half hour to an hour nap again before lunch. His longest nap tends to be early afternoon. It's so nice to know this, so I can plan to sleep with him for that last nap! ;)

It's so exciting getting to know him just a little bit better each week. There are so many changes, but each one just keeps getting better and better. I love his strength. I love the way he has started cuddling for a bit after he wakes up from some naps. I love gazing into his eyes and having him hold my gaze for long periods of time and then to see him crack a smile... I'm in awe.

Hello week 7!!!