It's remarkable how motherhood changes you. There've been many a time that I've pushed back at the demands of motherhood, the lack of sleep, the tears, the exhaustion, the constant hunger during pregnancy and breastfeeding, and need for caffeine. But, little by little, after the last five years of seasons of pregnancy, breastfeeding, toddlerhood, repeat, repeat... I've adapted and changed in ways perhaps only I can notice.
There's contentment and peace in knowing that each season is only a season.
There's comfort that comes from experience, which is something no book can teach you. I spent so much time reading and learning and trying before coming to the truth that had been there all along.
Motherhood is about finding your own voice, your own path, and walking that.
It's about finding your balance of nurturing and setting boundaries, of tending hearts and minds without pushing and pulling.
It's about seeking rest in the midst of chaos and tantrums, and it's about seeking forgiveness and being humble.
This first week at home hasn't always been peaceful, but it's been full of cuddles and love and incubating as our family of five.
It's been a reminder that time stands still for no one. Liesl's back to her birthweight and even had gained one ounce over her birthweight five days after birth! 8 lbs., 2 oz.
Our boys were once newborns, as well, and the time just disappears. We're soaking up as much as we can of that sweet newborn smell, the darling feet & toes, the kissable cheeks, and gripping baby fingers, and that soft skin.
My body made this beautiful girl, birthed, and now fully sustains her with breastmilk. I'm not trying to be superwoman this time. I'm planting myself on the couch and in the bed, because when else is it acceptable to just cuddle the day completely away? Why not have a lay-in?
My amazing husband has two weeks off of work, which is unheard of in our history of births. We've only had three days off after each of the boys' births. He chose to save his vacation time and take the two weeks and I am OH SO GRATEFUL. We've been fortunate to have a few meals swung by, total surprises. And one day, after taking the kids to the beach, he picked up scallops to surprise me with one of my favorite meals.
This time as a family has been special. Lots of time in the yard, finding caterpillars and naming them, singing and block-building inside, and campfires at the end of the day. We know how fleeting this time is and are trying to make it unique, but also as normal as possible for the boys.
Liesl's been a fan, too. She fits into our family so well.
She spends most of the day cluster feeding, lying on my chest, or sleeping the afternoon away in her cosleeper. I've enjoyed hunkering down with her during naptimes for the boys and snagging a nap myself.
She's giving us more and more alert periods and showing off her beautiful eyes.
It's safe to say that she's well-observed and well-loved around here.
We couldn't ask for a better transition with the boyos. They can be found singing her songs, bringing me books to read to them while nursing, and carrying on their normal activities and routines like champs.
Dusk settled on her due date, May 31st, and we couldn't have been more thankful for the extra six days to love on her. Our hearts were made to love her.
Bear with us, we may make mistakes, but WOW do we ever love you. Welcome to this crazy, boisterous, adventure-loving family. Today I looked down and saw her hand like this and thought... "Oh, sweet girl.... this is just the beginning!" <3
You are truly a gift. We know you're only on loan with us for so many years, and we don't want to waste a minute of getting to know you, love you, and cherish you just the way you are. Liesl Gale, thanks for making me a mama, times three. I've come a long way, but I still have so much to learn in this motherhood journey. I'm sure we will grow and learn a whole lot together over the years and I am savoring every cuddle and ready for this adventure called life with you.
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